Monday, January 30, 2012

34 days. We are operating without a net!

The cerclage has been officially removed as of 8am this morning. The most painful part was trying to get the right speculum. The first four didn't work but the fifth one was the charm. The knot of the first stitch was imbedded so that was a little difficult but my Dr got it out within a minute. The second stitch, even though it was placed really high in there, was actually easier to remove than the first. I had very little cramping and bleeding afterwards so I was sent home after an hour and half of monitoring. Instead of going right back to work, I decided to go home and sleep for a couple of hours. There is just something fantastic about taking mid day siesta!

I took it easy all weekend. I'm not a shamed to admit that I didn't get out of my pjs until 6pm on saturday night and that was only because I needed to go to Walmart and am addamit to not ever make the "people of Walmart".

Now I'm just going to be on pins and needles until my biophysical on wednesday. I'm just crossing my fingers that all this water drinking and relaxing will help me stay pregnant at least another week or two longer.

Thursday, January 26, 2012

38 days! There is never a dull moment in this pregnancy

I was kind of excited to go to my round of appointments yesterday (NST, reg ob visit, and perinatologist) because I was so sure that they were going to be pleased that my bp seemed to mellowed out and I havent really been having any issues. The nonstress test was a breeze and my regular ob appointment went about the same. But then I went to the perinatologist to have a growth scan done. I know they are much more thorough during these exams and didn't really think much about the questions the nurse was asking me during my growth scan. Do you have gestational diabetes? not to my knowledge, I was tested at 24 weeks and passed. How much water do you drink each day? Gallons. My bff is the bathroom and my workplace watercooler. How's the baby's movement? Hit or miss, the last week I've noticed the baby's movements slowing down a bit but I thought that was normal towards the end of pregnancy. Have you noticed that your leaking any fluid? No.

I finally just asked what was going on and she told me the baby was measuring a little on the big side for his gestational age (6.5lbs) and the fluid around the baby was low (right around a 7). After the scan, the nurse practitioner came in and checked to see if I was leaking any fluid, which I wasn't.

She disappeared for a few minutes and then came back with the peri. What a funny guy. He starts off by asking me how much beer I drink a day. It caught me off guard until I realized he has my medical history and could tell I'm originally from Wisconsin. I started to laugh and say I've been fine laying off the beer for the pregnancy, but I may need to be treated for my cheese addiction. After a couple of laughs he got down to business. He explained to me the cause and complications of large babies and low fluid. I've been on strict orders to increase the amount of water I drink a day which I don't know if that's possible considering how much I already drink. I'm also suppose to refrain from alot of activity and stress (I should of ask for this in writing so I could give it to my boss). He is still going to let me work the next week but when I'm not working I need to limit my activity level. They are going to check me again next wednesday to see if the fluid level improves. If it does, great I can carry on with what I'm doing. If it stays the same I'm going to be put on bedrest. If the fluid drops below a 5 they are going to consider inducing me. Thats a lot of "if's".

I left the appointment yesterday in semi-disbelief. Every little thing I chose to do in the next week could affect whether or not I have the baby next week or can be lucky enough to hold off until he's at least full term. I wasn't really emotional about it yesterday, just determined to follow doctors orders. Then this morning I told my boss the outcome of my appointment and the first thing he said was "wow, you might have a baby on Feb 1st". It hit me like a ton of bricks, that's 6 days away! Wholly crap, this baby will most likely have to spend time in the NICU, and I might have this baby when very few family and friends can reach me (family is on a cruise starting sunday and not returning till feb 5th). I want to go on bedrest now so I can try to buy a couple more weeks!! I don't want to sound like I'm overreacting but I don't understand why he didn't just put me on bedrest in the first place. I want to give this baby the best chance possible so I am instituting my own version of bedrest. I'm still going to work but I am going to try my best to relax while I'm here (easier said than done) and make sure I go straight home and put my feet up. No cleaning projects and no walking the dog for more than a quick lap around the parking lot. I just pray this works!

I will have my cerclage taken out on Monday. That's nerve racking on it's own. The doctor initially made it sound so effortless but then at this last appointment she said it is common to have some difficulties. The removal is already scheduled to be done in triage but she said that they do it that way because it allows her to get an OR room booked in case they need it. She originally told me that I could go back to work after the procedure but she didn't seem so confident at our appointment when I asked the question again. Hopefully I'm just reading to much into her response. If there are three things in this pregnancy that could go right in the next few weeks, I would hope it would be and easy cerclage removal, the amniotic fluid would increase, and I have an easy delivery.

Monday, January 23, 2012

41 Days

That due date must be approaching because I have been nesting like crazy. I don't think there is another inch left in my townhouse that wasn't cleaned in some fashion. I know I'm suppose to be relaxing and taking it easy to keep the bp down but I just couldn't help myself. While laying on the couch, I noticed a little dust on the TV. Next thing I know, I smell like a combination of Mr. Clean, pledge and comet. Sexy.

I finished my weekend up by getting a new hair cut. I figured it would be the last one I get before the LO arrives. Ooh and it is SOOOO the mommy cut. It was like the hairstylist didn't even need to ask what I wanted. So, your pregnant? yep, due in 5 weeks. So take a couple of inches off? yep, you know it! Presto chango....mommy-do. Short, no nonsense, still with a little style but yet easy to maintain.

Although work has been well aware of the baby coming soon, I don't think they understood what I meant by I'm taking the full three months off (FMLA). I told them this when I was 8 weeks pregnant, so they have had plenty of time to prepare. I started getting questions from my boss and manager this week about how often I plan to work from home while I'm gone, how often am I going to be checking my emails, how can we get some software on to my personal laptop so I can help them out. I said if I was on bedrest I could possibly help them out but not during my mat leave. Thank god, HR heard what was going on and told them that if I'm on disability or FMLA they cannot ask me to work even a single minute or it voids my disability and they have to pay me for a whole days worth of work. This new knowledge put my managers in a panic so we had an emergency meeting to discuss how they were going to get all our work done in the next 4 months (we have 3 major projects that need to be completed by the beginning of May, and two havent been started yet). The money-grubbing biotch in me wanted to say I will come back after 6 weeks if I can get an additonal 6 weeks of paid vacation to be used after the projects are submitted. However, the mommy side of me said NO WAY, I'm staying home to enjoy the baby. They are really going to struggle to get these projects done on time and correctly but I'm still so bitter that I've been sitting around for four months without any work that I really don't feel all that bad for them.

The UTI is gone! I don't have an ounce of back pain or cramping, I just feel preggo's and slow (mentally and physically). You know the typical late in pregnancy feelings. Shannon asked a great question on my last post about whether or not they were checking my urine at each appointment. Before each doctors appointment, the nurse does have me do a urine dipstick test and for two weeks prior to to this UTI the nurse kept saying that I had leukocytes (sp?) in my urine. I had no idea what that meant but since they didn't seem concerned, I wasn't concerned. After a brief date with DR Google over the weekend, I now know that it should have been one of the first signs to the doctor that I am fighting off an infection (of some sort) but I'm not sure if the nurse ever relayed this information to my doctor. I guess I will never know but fom now on if they say anything shows up on that test you better believe I am going to make a date with Dr Google again.

So has anyone out there had a cerclage removed? Was it painful? I've heard both ends of the spectrum...super painful or a total breeze. Although I hear it is really rare to go into labor immediately after getting a cerclage removed, I'm semi-paranoid that I will fall into the rare category. The majority of my family will be on a cruise ship in the middle of the carribbean from the Jan 28th to Feb 5th and I really don't want to have this little guy while they are out of the country....getting a tan and sippin' on pina coladas. Oooh sorry I drifted off there, I'm a little jealous of them:) So note to baby: YOU NEED TO STAY PUT UNTIL AFTER THE 5th!! He just kicked, I think he got the message :)

Thursday, January 19, 2012

45 days

I'm stealing sometime out of this day to capture the crazy events of the last few days. So the doctor put me on labetalol to reduce my bp. It dropped my bp down to into a much more normal level and for the most part it has stayed put ever since. Watching that number go down was a huge relief until around 6pm on Monday night when I started to experience a lot of menstral like cramping and off and on back pain. I figured it was just growing pains. I made myself a nice bath to see if it would help, but it was no good. After an hour in the bath, I layed down on the couch with a big jug of water (it's always good to stay hydrated) and a heating pad. The pain wasn't getting any worse but it wasn't getting any better so by 9ish, I gave up and tried to go to bed. Within a few hours I began to have horrible back spasms. It was like some was jabbing a knife into me. They would come and go without any predictable frequency. If I was in labor and these pains were actually contractions (which I have no clue what they feel like) I assumed I would have ripped through my cerclage and be bleeding like crazy by now. But I hadn't. Still trying to think rationally, I assumed it was either some sort of kidney/uti infection, I pulled my back out or I am having some sort of reaction to the lebatalol that I began taking just 6 hours prior. I've already been in the triage once in the last week (friday bp problem) and really did not want to go back so I stuck it out till 8am when I could get into see my doctor. Of course when I called they told me to go straight to triage.

As I was getting ready to leave the house, the tornado sirens started to go off. We were about to be walluped by a nasty line of storms and now I had to hope like heck that I made it to the hospital before it hit or I was going to be stuck out on the road during it. I'm thankful there weren't any cops along on my route because I think I was traveling around 60mph in a 45 mph zone nearly the whole way there. I started to just feel the first drops as I waddled my way into the triage department. As soon as the doors closed behind me, the sky opened up and the streets began to flood almost immediately. Upon checking into triage, the pain in my back was excrutiating. Every wave of pain just brought tears to my eyes. I thought I was very clear with the nurse that I thought I was NOT in labor but she didn't seem to believe me. She hooked me up to a couple of monitors. I wasn't really having any contractions, just a few small ones here and there. Baby's hb looked good. The nurse decided to check to see how dialated I was. 1cm. I was a little shocked to hear that I had dialated at all because I thought the cerclage would prevent that. Shows how much I know. The nurse then proceeded to do a fetal fibronectin test. I swear she is a really nice nurse but damn I hate that woman!! She inserted the speculum, performed the swap and proceeded to yank the speculum out without closing it!! I jumped and nearly nailed her in he face with my knee. She apologized profusely and apologized even more when she told me I'm probably going to be bleeding from the exam. I kept telling her it was ok (I'm sure it was truly an accident) meanwhile in my head I was calling her every name in the book. She then disappeared for the next two hours while I tried to find some position that would relief the back and vajayjay pain. When she finally came back she said the Fibronectin test came back negative and that I was not going to be delivering my baby in the next 2 weeks. Great news but I didn't think I was in labor. So what is causing all this pain I asked. She told me it had to be muscular pain and that I should sit around on all fours as much as possible to put counter pressure on my back.

Call my a cynic, but I really wasn't buying it. At age 24 I was in a horrific car accident which took months to recover from and this pain was on par with that pain. I was afraid to ask if she was sure, she's a medical professional but then again I didn't feel like she was giving me the right answer. I felt that way once before when I came in because I thought my water broke (granted they were right, but the way the information was delivered didn't really give me a vote of confidence). I made the decision to not question her judgement, I decided to take her advice and go home to hang out on all fours. She told me to get dressed and that I was free to go. After I signed the release paper work she asked me when my next doctors appointment would be. It was scheduled for wednesday afternoon, the following day. She said great, you might want them to check your urine for a UTI because that could be causing all of this pain too. WTH????

I think I just glared at her. I felt like demanding her to check it right then and there (which I really wished I had) but I was so pissed that I've been sitting in triage in horrendous pain for over three hours and all possible causes weren't explored that I just wanted to get as far away from this woman as possible. Could it just be pain caused by the strain of my growing belly....yes absolutely. Could this be an infection....yes (insert sarcasm) but lets not rule out any common pregnancy infections that can harm my baby or me (which incidently is a very cheap, quick test)!!

I took the day off and tried the "all fours", heating pad, layin down, a shower etc, but nothing was working. By the end of the day I could barely take four steps without having to stop moving. I tried sleeping sitting up in the living room chair but that wasn't really cutting it either. Crap, if labor pain is anything like this I'm going to ask them to hook me up for an epi as soon as I walk in to the hospital.

I took another day off and waited for my 1pm appointment. I got there at 12:45 and, go figure, the receptionist forgot to check me in to the system. I sat out in the waiting room for an hour before I finally go up and asked her how much longer it was going to be. Her eyes got as big as saucers when she realized she made a mistake. I think at this point I just about had it with the medical profession (pregnancy hormones talking here). I tried to redirect my rage which then turned me into an emotional mess. My doctor's nurse called me back and I explained that I had been in triage the day before, the pain, and that I was directed to ask for a urine screening from the doctor today. She did a double take. I don't think she even believed me at first until they read the notes on the triage visit. When I told my doctor (again I was very emotional), I told her as calmly as possible that I never want to go into that triage again and that they're all assholes there. As the word asshole still lingered on my lips I instantly regretted it. Oh my god, I'm pregzilla! My doctor started to laugh until she realized I was pretty serious. She asked me what the nurse's name was, I told her, and she said that was really surprising for that nurse to make that kind of mistake. I just sat there still mortified that I called the triage unit a band of assholes, yet a little miffed that my doctor didn't seem to believe me. UUUGGGHHHHH.

I'm sure it was mostly to appease me but the doctor agreed to send me for a urine test. She also repeated the nurses orders to hang out on all fours. I was just so embarassed at this point I was grateful for the appointment to end. The doctor was nice and pleasant the rest of the appointment, scheduled my cerclage removal (the 30th and it is coming out fast, ironically procedure will be done in triage), and covered the bp issues.

This morning I get a phone call from the doctors office. I have a raging UTI and am now on the antibiotics. After the first round I've started to see a wee bit of a difference and am so grateful for any relief I can get. Maybe I can sleep in my bed tonight. I'm clearly still miffed about the nurse not jut checking for a UTI on Tuesday but I'll get over it. Now I'm just worried my doctor repeated my complaint to the triage people. Can you be black-balled in triage? I still have to go in to that place at least 2 more times and I really don't want them to show me their "bad side". I can see the birth of my son now, the nurses are high-fiving each other out in the hallway while one is in telling me that they "can't figure out" why my epi is not working. Gulp....

Seriously can this pregnancy get anymore crazy? I thought I would love every minute of being pregnant but I think this rollercoaster was almost worse than going through IF treatments. Don't get me wrong, I love watching my belly dance around and I am going to get a great son out of this but I am ready to have this baby and get this phase done and over with. Only 45 days left.

Ok ladies, pj's are out of my hospital bag. I had to laugh when I looked at the bag because it is so empty I thought briefly about not taking it at all. Of course I'm joking but my sister thankfully reminded me that the hospital sends you home with a ton of things so the extra space should come in handy.

Ali, I found a great baby book for single women. It was kind of expensive but I love how easy it is to personalize it. It's made by Tesserra book company out of Milwaukee, WI. I ordered it off their website and I had it within a few days. I love it!

Monday, January 16, 2012

48 days

The BP was doing so well on Saturday I really thought I was in the clear but then Sunday it started to creep into the danger zone. I headed into work on Sunday night and started to get my co-workers ready for a possible quick departure. I sent them information on my projects, provided passwords, etc. I kept thinking that I was probably going overboard and this was completely unneccessary this early but after my round of self doubt and taking my bp twice today I might not have been overacting afterall. I'm now waiting to pick up a script for some bp meds and if that doesnt work the doc said I need to come back in. The nurse made it sound like I would most likely need to be put on bedrest at home. My 24 hour urine culture showed I was dropping protein but she said I was borderline so she wasn't too worried. Am I on the way to develping pre-eclampsia? Is there a chance I can just stay this way the rest of my pregnancy? I'm trying to stay cool as a cucumber but I'm definitely getting worried. I want to let this baby cook for at least another 3-4 weeks so I can reach full-term.

Ohh and the name situation. I keep thinking I found THE name but I keep second guessing it. I'm all over the place. I hope that when I see his sweet face it will just come to me but in the mean time the decision is making my batty. I rarely this indecisive so I am going to attribute it to my preggo hormones.

After reading comments from the last post, I've decided to go with packing the bare min. Going home outfit for me and the baby, bath necessities, camera, phone, chargers, baby book (to get his feet stamped) and maybe my laptop. I might also throw some snack food in there too because I hear the kitchen closes at 8pm and if I deliver after that, It's no food until the morning. I have had a couple of co-workers tell me they never bothered to use their own pajamas so I am forgoing that too. Sounds like a plan.

Friday, January 13, 2012

51 days

The last week has been just another ride on the pregnancy rollercoaster. I went in to take care of the hemmorhoids and the new doctor said there was nothing they could do about it. I have to say I was a little relieved because they haven't been as painful as last week and I wasn't looking forward to, what I hear, a painful procedure but I was also a little mad that I had to take a half day off only to find out they couldn't do anything for me.

I went in for my regularly scheduled ob appointment this morning thinking that I feel great, this is going to be a quick 15 minute appointment and then I could head back to work. Wrong. They took my bp and it was 158 over 88 which I honestly thought it was just a fluke. So they took again about 10 minutes later and it was 156 over 84. WTH??? I thought that if I quit my second job it would provide me with enough time to kick back and relax so these type of probs wouldn't come up. I guess I thought wrong. The doctor sent me down to triage where they did some blood work and started me on a 24 hour urine collection to see if I'm spilling protein. My bp down in triage was in the 130's/70's which is back in the normal range, so the numbers we were getting up in the doctors office was most likely a fluke. I was eventually sent home with instructions to continue the 24 hour urine collection and begin monitoring my bp 2-3xs a day. The nurse told me it might not hurt to keep my bags packed and in the car from this point on. When the nurse told be to start packing my bag, it just made the impending birth of my little guy all that much more real.

Holy crap I'm going to be a mom soon.

Between bp's taken up at the doctors office, the doctor talked to me about getting my cerclage out. It looks like it will be coming out in less than 3 wks although she hasn't scheduled it yet. I've heard from others that they do not numb you for the cerclage removal but she said it shouldn't be painful. I guess they used to do the removal in triage but she said she felt more comfortable doing it in the OR. I was a little afraid to ask why. If you know why, please don't tell me. Ignorance is bliss. She also has me coming in every week until baby's b-day. Again, holy crap I'm going to be a mom soon.

While walking down to traige, I kept thinking I need to still wash the floors, take care of the litter box, get Cooper (dog) to doggy daycare, vaccuum, etc. I think this little incident made me realize that I just need to be better prepared for any last minute changes in the baby plan. I think from now on when I go in for a doctors appointments I'm going to make sure my cleaning list is done (to the best of my ability) before I leave. I would hate for my family to come down and have to help me clean.

Let me finish this post with one of the best pregnancy-brain stories I've heard in a long time...thankfully this one is not about me. My bff, who is 24 wks along drove to work and parked. She has to take a bus from the parking lot to her office (she works on a university campus). It was raining really hard that morning and as she was pulling in, she could see the bus coming. Instead of risking having to sit in the rain while waiting for the next bus, she quickly parked, hit the lock on the door, and ran to catch the bus. At the end of the day, she caught the bus back to the parking lot. While on the bus she searched through her purse and jacket for her keys but couldn't find them anywhere. Then it dawned on her that she didn't use her keyfaub to lock her car door so she instantly assumed that she locked her keys in her car. She starts to call her husband to tell him he's going to have to make the hour drive to her office with her spare keys when she approaches the car and sees that not only did she not lock her door to her car but she left the car running!!! Her car sat out for over 8.5 hours running in the university parking lot and no one stole it!! I told her she must be the luckiest person I've ever met and that she might want to buy a lottery ticket asap! Even better she still had gas left, who knew you can leave a car idling for that long and not run out of gas? lol.

Thursday, January 5, 2012

59 days!! Gulp!

The days are flying by faster and faster. My doctor finally pulled the plug on my second job (restaurant job) this week after I started experiencing a tremendous amount of pressure in my lower pelvic region. Work at the restaurant was crazy this weekend and I know I over did it but I got to tell you, depositing the $500+ dollars into my checking account was really nice. All the running around helped the baby drop. The pressure has caused so much havoc though that I developed hemorrhoids that will need to be lanced by a colon-rectal surgeon next Tuesday. Loads of fun!! Sitting at my day job has been difficult but I'm afraid if I tell them I need to start working from home, it will cause more problems than its worth so I'm sucking it up.

Since the fiasco of two weeks ago, things have calmed down a bit. My d-bag manager never got in trouble but we arranged a new system where he has to send an email to both me and our boss stating what work will be given to me each week, time constraints, any training that will be needed to do the task, etc. I was skeptical at first, but this system will prevent him from stealing work or preventing me from working.....I hope. It at least prevents any "he said, she said crap". The funny part about it all was this week his email said he had no work for me to do. A little birdie told me that the boss did tell him that was unacceptable and so now I have work coming out of my ears. Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining one bit. It just cracked me up that he would still try that crap. Did you hear that???? I think that was the crack of the whip.